crankyoldman (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
crankyoldman) wrote2008-01-13 09:12 pm
crankyoldman) wrote2008-01-13 09:12 pm
Operation White Widow
So, today I was part of a spy mission.
Alright, not the kind where I got a gun, but the kind where I got to dress rather girly and talk with a very breathy sort of voice. Justin had to handle a lot of the actual asking of questions and serious work, I just got to have fun messing with people's heads.
See, my friend Justin knows some DJs. The kids seem fun, and they were at a bridal show today. Well, they wanted to know what their competitors were offering, and since Justin is a nice guy, he offered to pretend to be getting married. Since I figured this would be HILARIOUS, I decided to come along too.
I am a bit of a sociologist at heart, and let me tell you, the types of people you see at a bridal show are an awesome cross-section. There was a death metal looking couple, some hicks (which I can say because I'm not so far removed from being a hick myself), the Scariest Mothers Ever, and well, normal people. Kind of. And since I probably would be in theater if I were not ridiculous stage shy, I decided to indulge in my drama side a bit.
I suddenly get why My Best Friend's Wedding is such a popular movie. Playing the crazy bridesmaid is so ridiculously fun.
My first chance at vapid breathy sincerity was a couple of nosey ladies at one booth. Now, I don't mind people being friendly, but there's a line in which... well, suffice to say, I didn't feel bad for fucking with them a bit.
Them: *had been keeping up pleasant conversation with me for a bit*
Them: So are you getting married?
Me: Oh no, my best friend is.
Them: So you're standing in for her?
Me: Yeah, she had to work.
[some shallow bridesmaidy talk here]
Them: Doesn't it bother you not getting married? I mean, you seem close to the groom.
Me: *eyebrow raise* I'm good friends with both of them.
Them: But every girl wants to get married sometime.
Me: Actually, after the first two marriages ended in tragedy, I decided to take a breather.
Woman 1: ...
Woman 2: ...
Woman 1: ...How old are you?
Me: Twenty. That's what I get for falling for government workers.
Them: *leave me alone after that*
Note, I was only married once and I'm 22. I only fibbed a little. I might be a little cruel.
And a conversation with a caterer:
Caterer: It's a shame when you lose your best friend to marriage, isn't it?
Me: Well, she did say she was willing to share. *grin*
Caterer: ...
Mind you, I don't mind that people make a living off of some of this stuff. I just find the whole affair... excessive. I mean, there was a decorated port-a-potty. And the prices on all the tacky crap were RIDICULOUS. I mean, say what you will, but aside from the religious and ceremonial aspects, a wedding is just a party. I can understand wanting to look good, but I managed to do my wedding pretty damn cheap and still have all the parts that are traditional and fun in it. Now, I can't say as much about the actual marriage...
People wonder why there's such a high rate of divorce... well, most arguments with married people are over money, it's been found. Maybe spending less on a party so you're not in debt to start off might help? Just a thought. If you want to have a magical day of prettyness and can afford it, hell, go for it.
But the lesson here? Just say no to laser hair removal. It looks painful (yes there was a BOOTH FOR THAT).
~Cendri
Alright, not the kind where I got a gun, but the kind where I got to dress rather girly and talk with a very breathy sort of voice. Justin had to handle a lot of the actual asking of questions and serious work, I just got to have fun messing with people's heads.
See, my friend Justin knows some DJs. The kids seem fun, and they were at a bridal show today. Well, they wanted to know what their competitors were offering, and since Justin is a nice guy, he offered to pretend to be getting married. Since I figured this would be HILARIOUS, I decided to come along too.
I am a bit of a sociologist at heart, and let me tell you, the types of people you see at a bridal show are an awesome cross-section. There was a death metal looking couple, some hicks (which I can say because I'm not so far removed from being a hick myself), the Scariest Mothers Ever, and well, normal people. Kind of. And since I probably would be in theater if I were not ridiculous stage shy, I decided to indulge in my drama side a bit.
I suddenly get why My Best Friend's Wedding is such a popular movie. Playing the crazy bridesmaid is so ridiculously fun.
My first chance at vapid breathy sincerity was a couple of nosey ladies at one booth. Now, I don't mind people being friendly, but there's a line in which... well, suffice to say, I didn't feel bad for fucking with them a bit.
Them: *had been keeping up pleasant conversation with me for a bit*
Them: So are you getting married?
Me: Oh no, my best friend is.
Them: So you're standing in for her?
Me: Yeah, she had to work.
[some shallow bridesmaidy talk here]
Them: Doesn't it bother you not getting married? I mean, you seem close to the groom.
Me: *eyebrow raise* I'm good friends with both of them.
Them: But every girl wants to get married sometime.
Me: Actually, after the first two marriages ended in tragedy, I decided to take a breather.
Woman 1: ...
Woman 2: ...
Woman 1: ...How old are you?
Me: Twenty. That's what I get for falling for government workers.
Them: *leave me alone after that*
Note, I was only married once and I'm 22. I only fibbed a little. I might be a little cruel.
And a conversation with a caterer:
Caterer: It's a shame when you lose your best friend to marriage, isn't it?
Me: Well, she did say she was willing to share. *grin*
Caterer: ...
Mind you, I don't mind that people make a living off of some of this stuff. I just find the whole affair... excessive. I mean, there was a decorated port-a-potty. And the prices on all the tacky crap were RIDICULOUS. I mean, say what you will, but aside from the religious and ceremonial aspects, a wedding is just a party. I can understand wanting to look good, but I managed to do my wedding pretty damn cheap and still have all the parts that are traditional and fun in it. Now, I can't say as much about the actual marriage...
People wonder why there's such a high rate of divorce... well, most arguments with married people are over money, it's been found. Maybe spending less on a party so you're not in debt to start off might help? Just a thought. If you want to have a magical day of prettyness and can afford it, hell, go for it.
But the lesson here? Just say no to laser hair removal. It looks painful (yes there was a BOOTH FOR THAT).
~Cendri