Doom and ale
Jul. 7th, 2008 03:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
crankyoldmanMan, but I am tired. My liver is thoroughly pickled. Eesh. I find it hilarious that I hung out, had beer, went to a winery, and then when my parents come home, I find they've brought me nice drinkies. Ha.
So I was thinking about porn again.
Alright, so probably because my mom was extremely open about talking about sex (but not particularly kinky) I an endlessly fascinated by certain things. One being BSDM culture, which I think is one of the healthier managements of kink ever. Namely because it's built on rules, safety, and most of all, respect. Sure, a lot of media and pop culture seem to be focused on the bootlicking aspects, but that actually more came about because of the industry. An actual BSDM relationship takes a lot while to get to that phase, and requires loads of trust.
Now, I was thinking about porn because a lot of power politics in sexuality have been coming up lately. And I'm the thinking type, so that's what I do. Think. And my major squick is when someone just does not do the research and misses the point. An imbalanced power relationship is destructive for both parties without some form of conscious giving of power on one or the other parts. Simply taking is generally considered, well, crime in this day and age.
"But it's fantasy" you say. Exaggeration. Well, sure. I know a lot of it is not real, but I still... maybe I demand a bit much, but if I'm going to enjoy something, it'll do a good job that despite sexing something up it'll remind us that there is in fact something wrong about it. For instance, I've always sort of had a thing for the detective/femme fatale types of relations. Part of me would not mind if a seriously foxy lady just destroyed my life. But reason dictates that I won't let this go too far. Partly because the chances of this happening are zero to nil, and partly because I know she will ruin my life.
Abuses of positions of power have always always been my biggest turnoffs. Pederasty (abuse of maturity) and boss/employee (abuse of power) are common things that people tend to gloss over, as they are major kinks. And sometimes it can be done awesomely, when someone does the research. Like a boss making an employee do sexual acts (or worse, suddenly FORCING said acts) is oftentimes played off as sexy. When in reality, it's humiliating. It's akin to the old Victorian rape fantasies; an over exaggeration to the point that what it's based on no longer looks like it (rape is not about sex, it's about power and violence).
Far be it for me to dictate what gets you going, I merely want some conscientious thought is all. And note that all of this is completely devoid of gender; slash stories are almost worse than a lot of hetero stuff in the regard of porn without a conscientious point of reference. Lust, Caution managed what started as a power imbalance and really showed how it fucked with both of the people involved's minds and later led to something almost kind of sweet (only almost. they are messed up people). There was a plot (and some pretty fantastic acting) in the middle of the porn. And it's basically going to be biggest example of Porn WITH Plot for like, years.
Hell, even some Porn Without Point can be awesome (pretty much any time the music gets louder on Queer As Folk, Brian's having sex. And yet this is done AWESOMELY). There's just a larger context to consider.
I think this means I have to attempt to write more porn, much as it pains me. XD
Now back to some semblance of work.
So I was thinking about porn again.
Alright, so probably because my mom was extremely open about talking about sex (but not particularly kinky) I an endlessly fascinated by certain things. One being BSDM culture, which I think is one of the healthier managements of kink ever. Namely because it's built on rules, safety, and most of all, respect. Sure, a lot of media and pop culture seem to be focused on the bootlicking aspects, but that actually more came about because of the industry. An actual BSDM relationship takes a lot while to get to that phase, and requires loads of trust.
Now, I was thinking about porn because a lot of power politics in sexuality have been coming up lately. And I'm the thinking type, so that's what I do. Think. And my major squick is when someone just does not do the research and misses the point. An imbalanced power relationship is destructive for both parties without some form of conscious giving of power on one or the other parts. Simply taking is generally considered, well, crime in this day and age.
"But it's fantasy" you say. Exaggeration. Well, sure. I know a lot of it is not real, but I still... maybe I demand a bit much, but if I'm going to enjoy something, it'll do a good job that despite sexing something up it'll remind us that there is in fact something wrong about it. For instance, I've always sort of had a thing for the detective/femme fatale types of relations. Part of me would not mind if a seriously foxy lady just destroyed my life. But reason dictates that I won't let this go too far. Partly because the chances of this happening are zero to nil, and partly because I know she will ruin my life.
Abuses of positions of power have always always been my biggest turnoffs. Pederasty (abuse of maturity) and boss/employee (abuse of power) are common things that people tend to gloss over, as they are major kinks. And sometimes it can be done awesomely, when someone does the research. Like a boss making an employee do sexual acts (or worse, suddenly FORCING said acts) is oftentimes played off as sexy. When in reality, it's humiliating. It's akin to the old Victorian rape fantasies; an over exaggeration to the point that what it's based on no longer looks like it (rape is not about sex, it's about power and violence).
Far be it for me to dictate what gets you going, I merely want some conscientious thought is all. And note that all of this is completely devoid of gender; slash stories are almost worse than a lot of hetero stuff in the regard of porn without a conscientious point of reference. Lust, Caution managed what started as a power imbalance and really showed how it fucked with both of the people involved's minds and later led to something almost kind of sweet (only almost. they are messed up people). There was a plot (and some pretty fantastic acting) in the middle of the porn. And it's basically going to be biggest example of Porn WITH Plot for like, years.
Hell, even some Porn Without Point can be awesome (pretty much any time the music gets louder on Queer As Folk, Brian's having sex. And yet this is done AWESOMELY). There's just a larger context to consider.
I think this means I have to attempt to write more porn, much as it pains me. XD
Now back to some semblance of work.